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by Dr Pastor David Goodwin, KidsReach

Lately, we’ve seen a lot of tough and sad events. From violent events in Sydney to ongoing conflicts worldwide, it’s natural to feel overwhelmed and unsure about what’s happening now and what’s to come.

One event that shook us was the tragic stabbing in Bondi Junction. The images of the baby whose mum was killed and the dad protecting his kids from seeing it will stick with us for a while. There was also the Bishop knifed in the face during Divine Liturgy, followed by a riot outside his church.

Places like churches and malls are supposed to be safe, so when they’re not, it’s unsettling.

Additionally, there has been the media’s focus on the Bruce Lehrmann rape case and the escalating tensions in the Middle East and Ukraine that have only added to the sense of unease and distress.

With news available 24/7 on televisions, radios, phones, and newspapers, it’s hard to escape. We’re bombarded with bad news, and making sense of it all is tough.

Naturally, all this affects our mental health. We feel anxious, angry, and sometimes even depressed, especially when these events hit close to home.

Some people are scared to speak up about things like what is happening in Gaza, because they fear getting into an argument and being judged for their opinions, so they bottle it up inside.

Our kids feel it, too. They might be scared or anxious. As parents, we must be there for them, providing comfort and guidance.

Prioritising Self-Care and Seeking Support

The first rule of first aid is to look after yourself first. You will be better equipped to support your children by prioritising self-care and seeking support when needed. It’s okay to say, “I’m feeling really upset about this. I want to have a conversation.” You can do this in your fellowship group, with a close friend or a prayer partner.

But if you’re worried about how that conversation will go, you should consider speaking with a pastor, counsellor or other health professional to get the support you need. A counsellor can help you debrief, learn new tools and techniques to manage your thoughts, give you tips to help you nurture your mental health, and provide ideas for self-care.

If you are a cell group leader, when these conversations happen, remember to listen and support without judging and gently show them how to look to the Word of God for help.

Managing Negative Thoughts

Philippians 4:4-8 gives clear instructions on how to manage anxious thoughts. Instead of allowing anxious thoughts to consume you, bring your concerns to God through prayer (v6). Share your worries and fears with Him, trusting that He cares for you and is able to provide peace that surpasses understanding.

Trust that as you surrender your anxieties to God in prayer, He will grant you a peace that transcends human understanding (v7). This peace will act as a guard over your heart and mind, protecting you from the debilitating effects of anxiety.

Redirect your thoughts towards things that are positive and uplifting (v8). Fill your mind with thoughts that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy. This practice can help counteract anxious thinking patterns and promote mental well-being.

When negative thoughts arise, immediately switch your focus to God’s Word and confess it out loud (2 Corinthians 10:3-5).

Nurturing Mental Health through the Word of God

• “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear.” (Psalm 46:1-3)
• “The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in His love, He will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.” (Zephaniah3:17)
• “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:7)
• Seek the Lord when your mental health is out of balance, as He will deliver you from your fears and give you peace. (Psalm 34:4-5, Isaiah 41:10)

Here are some ideas for self-care:

• Spend time in prayer and reading Scripture to renew your mind (Romans 12:2).
• Engage in physical activity, spend time in nature, and connect with supportive friends and family.
• Limit exposure to distressing news and social media; instead, focus on uplifting and positive content.
• Seek professional help from a counsellor if you’re struggling with your mental health and need additional support.

The key is to turn to God’s Word, rely on His strength, and proactively care for your mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being during challenging times.

Disconnect to Reconnect

It’s important to be informed about the world, but constant exposure to distressing news and information can take a toll on your mental health. If you find yourself in a state of persistent anxiety and distress, it may be time to take a break from the screens and devices.

Constantly scrolling through your phone or reading about the horrible events happening around the world will be bad for your mental well-being. If you don’t know how to process all that information, it’s better to turn off your phone or screen and engage in more positive, stimulating activities.

Instead of staying glued to the news, consider going out, talking to your friends, being in touch with your cell group, engaging in physical activity or playing with your children. These are all good ways to nurture your mental health and well-being.

Once you’ve had a chance to recharge and feel better, you can go back and try to understand what’s happening in the world. But it’s crucial that you first take care of your own emotional and mental needs.

Remember, it’s not about completely disconnecting from the world, but finding a healthy balance between staying informed and maintaining your well-being.

By prioritising self-care and managing your media consumption, you’ll be better equipped to navigate these challenging times with resilience and clarity.

Helping Your Children

Your kids pick up on your feelings, so caring for yourself will help them. Here are a few tips that follow along the same pathway to helping yourself:

Create a Safe Environment for your children to talk: Be non-judgmental and listen to your children. It is so easy to come across as critical when they try to talk to you. Instead, validate their thoughts and feelings with statements such as, “I am glad you told me that,” or “It takes a lot of courage to share how you feel.” Let them know it’s okay to feel scared or worried and that you are there to listen and support them.

Limit their Exposure to News and Media: Monitor and limit children’s exposure to distressing news and media content, especially if it’s not age-appropriate and repeats the same horrific scenes repeatedly. Shielding them from graphic or upsetting images can help reduce their anxiety levels.

Provide Age-Appropriate Information: Offer factual and age-appropriate information about current events or challenging situations. Use simple language and provide context to help children understand what’s happening without overwhelming them with details.

Focus on Positive Stories and Acts of Kindness: This is a big one.  Balance out negative news with stories of hope, resilience, and acts of kindness. Highlighting positive examples can instil optimism and reassure children that there is goodness in the world.

Promote Spiritual Exercises: Teach children how to pray about their concerns and how to speak the Word of God into their anxieties. Share with them that this is what you do and how you do it.

Model Coping Strategies: Be a positive role model by demonstrating healthy coping strategies for managing stress and anxiety. Show children how to problem-solve, practice self-care, and seek support from others when needed.

Where children are directly affected —

Maintain Routines and Structure: Establishing consistent routines and structures can provide children stability and security during uncertain times. Stick to regular meal times, bedtime routines, and other familiar activities as much as possible.

Encourage Healthy Habits: Emphasise the importance of self-care and healthy habits, including regular exercise, nutritious meals, adequate sleep, and time spent outdoors.

Seek Professional Help if Necessary: If a child’s anxiety persists or significantly impacts their daily functioning, consider seeking guidance from a mental health professional or counsellor who specialises in working with children and adolescents.

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Image courtesy of Pavel Danilyuk.