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Life is full of embarrassing moments. Chin up — you’re not alone in this!

We would love to think that we have it all together, that we can handle whatever life situations come our way. This of course is not what life is like at all.

Even with our best intentions, we can make a real fool of ourselves. Every day, even the simplest decisions can be fraught with unintended results.

We can all experience a momentary lapse of concentration, leading to personal embarrassment or even physical injury. As we get older, we can also fall victim to overestimating our abilities.

I want to help you feel better about yourself by letting you know that you are not the only one who has these experiences. Let me share some of my most memorable unhinged moments.

Well-Intentioned Insults

When I was 19, I was trying to help my younger sister cross a rock shelf leading down to the beach. I had just taken my first step onto that surface, not knowing it was wet and slippery. My head and feet suddenly changed places! This resulted in the wearing of a dental plate from then on.

One day while browsing in an antique store, a busload of senior citizens arrived. Having been taught good manners from an early age, as some elderly women entered my narrow aisle, I backed up to let them pass.

Unfortunately, I pressed too hard against the shelving, and it fell to the ground with a crash! My wife was in another part of the store, hoping that the bang wasn’t my fault. When she came to the front counter, there I was with my credit card, paying for a broken sandwich tray. Apart from my pride, that was the only smashed piece!

In my younger years, I was often guilty of complimenting someone, unintentionally using the wrong word or judging someone’s condition incorrectly. I was the one who would ask an overweight woman when her child was due.

There was also the time I told a woman who had a real motherly attitude that she was homely. I was shocked when her cutting response to me was to outline in detail what homely meant. If you say that someone is homely, you mean that they are plain and not very attractive to look at.

I have since learned the wisdom of Proverbs 17:28 (NKJV),

Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace;
When he shuts his lips, he is considered perceptive.

Unintended Consequences

Holidays are mostly fun times, but sometimes the most vivid memories are of those things that go wrong. We went snorkelling on a reef. As I donned my swimming gear and adjusted my snorkel, I was unaware that my dental plate had fallen out of my mouth and dropped overboard.

After half an hour of snorkelling, I reboarded the boat and soon felt the gap in my mouth! Miraculously, a native diver looked for the plate and surfaced 30 seconds later with it in his hand. All I can say is that the Good Shepherd still searches for and finds the lost.

A few years ago, we fostered a 3-year-old girl. I would often do things to make her laugh. On one occasion I dressed up as Jake the Peg (with his extra leg). Unannounced, I walked into the room where my wife and foster child sat.

To that little girl, I was unrecognisable. Worse still, this stranger had 3 legs! When I saw that she was terrified by this sight, I unthinkingly pulled the false one off to show her. My hope of alleviating her trauma quickly disappeared and it was some time till she realised it was me.

A Lapse of Concentration

We were at a church camp years ago. Our accommodation consisted of twelve motel-like units next to each other. Except for their room numbers, they all looked alike.

Later, I returned to what I thought was our cabin, but as I opened the door, I was confronted with the sight of a half-undressed woman. As I said, “What are you doing in my cabin?” I immediately knew the answer.

I backed out apologising profusely and ran down to my unit, rushed in and went into a foetal position on our bed, saying to my wife, “I’m going to hell!” For the rest of that camp, the woman’s husband could be seen standing on guard outside their cabin.

One day I was doing the cooking. I had just baked an egg and bacon pie, my specialty. I put an oven glove on my right hand, opened the oven door and drew the dish out. As I turned to put it down on the kitchen bench, I absentmindedly put that extremely hot dish into my ungloved hand.

It didn’t take me long to work out that I needed to let go of that hot dish, which I did immediately. Shattered glass and splattered food were soon cleaned off the floor and we enjoyed tasty takeaway that night.

I took my wife to an appointment the other day. She went in while I walked up to the local shops. On returning to the car, I hadn’t noticed that there were two identical-looking cars in the car park, mine and someone else’s.

As usual, I pressed the remote to unlock the car then opened the rear door behind the driver’s seat to put my man bag inside. As I did this, I found a woman sitting in the driver’s seat and she wasn’t my wife. Both of us got a shock. I quickly realised my error, apologised and went straight to our own car.

Overestimating One’s Abilities

Just before retiring from the teaching profession, I was on yard duty in the playground. One of the Year 1 boys asked me to join their soccer side as the numbers were uneven. I humoured him and said yes.

As the ball came towards me for the first time, I swung my leg to kick it but missed the ball completely and ended up on my back on the grass. I looked up into that same boy’s face and heard him say, “I don’t think you should play soccer, Mr Vincent.”

A job that often needed to be done was the cleaning of the gutters. One weekday I borrowed a neighbour’s long ladder to get up on the roof. My wife was out at the time, and I thought this wouldn’t take long to do.

I easily leaned the ladder against the roofline and climbed onto the roof. When I had finished cleaning out the valley gutter, I went to descend the ladder. Try as I might, I couldn’t find the confidence to get my feet onto the ladder’s rung to climb down.  I was stuck.

My wife wasn’t going to be home for some time and most of the neighbours were at work. Then I remembered Wesley next door. He worked from home. I was finally able to get his attention and he helped me down. No more roof work for me.

Never underestimate the value of a good neighbour,

Better is a neighbour nearby than a brother far away. (Proverbs 17:10b NKJV)

What does God think of you at these times?

He doesn’t stop loving you. He knows that you are just dust. As our loving Father, He just looks down at us and in the presence of His angels says, “That’s one of my children. Isn’t he the cutest?”

Don’t take yourself too seriously today!

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Photo by Andrea Piacquadio.