The Story of Losing My Brother Too Soon, and His Legacy of Love
“The idea is to die young as late as possible,” are the humorous words of Ashley Montagu. Perhaps my younger brother, Cameron Marsh, never heard those words because, sadly, he has beaten me to the grave. My younger brother died in a car accident in Tasmania on 16 January 2025, not too far from where he lived.
Cameron was a passenger in a car, and it was relatively instantaneous. Obviously, he did not expect it. None of us expect our own death, even though it is inevitable! Benjamin Franklin’s famous quote comes to mind, “In this world, nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.”
I’m happy to report that I had talked to him two days before on the phone. My last words on most of my phone conversations are, “I love you.” I was especially glad I did this when I last spoke to my brother.
I was even gladder that I made my brother stand up at my 70th birthday party, to thank him for coming all the way from Tasmania to my party, and for being my brother. I even asked the audience to enthusiastically cheer him.
Better still, my wife and I were in Tasmania in December last year, and we spent the best part of three days together with my brother. The words I love you and I appreciate you crossed my lips more than once, but not as much as I would have liked.
Brian Clough was right to say, “Don’t send me flowers when I’m dead. If you like me, send them while I’m alive.”
Two of my sons were able to make it to Cameron’s Thanksgiving Funeral Celebration Service. With my wife, we shared one of Cameron’s songs, as he too was a singer-songwriter. Both Nathaniel and Israel shared a short tribute to my brother, as did Jack Dance, his eldest grandson. I did the eulogy and Cameron’s pastor, Greg Jones, gave a great message. Watch it below.
I find funerals fascinating because you cannot script what people are going to say. When someone dies, you usually hear the truth because it has a funny way of bobbing to the surface in the furnace of grief.
Legacy of Love
You might remember two months ago, I wrote a story about UFC promoter Dana White’s Ultimate Test for Success.
This quote by Dana White from the article tells the story well:
“You know everybody’s always asking about your legacy. What you did for a living isn’t your legacy. Your legacy is your children, and their children, and how they feel about you.
We all make mistakes, and we all fail in life in many different ways and many different things. My opinion is the one thing that you cannot fail at is being a parent. This is the ultimate failure. It shows that you really weren’t focused on the right things in your life if that’s what you fail at.”
The really good news is my brother Cameron left a living legacy displayed in his only daughter, grandchildren, nephews and nieces. The furnace of grief brings the truth to the top.
Jack Dance, speaking on behalf of the Dance family at the Celebration Service, said,
“Pop was always someone who was generous with his time. If there was a job to be done, whether for family or for friends, and he was able to help, he would be there…
‘Bless you guys’ was one of his favourite sayings. We are truly blessed in so many ways, and we are blessed because we had a Pop with a strong faith who prayed for us and believed in us. Pop loved us and loved his family more than anything; we will miss him for his fun and the special character he was and all that he brought to our family.”
Watch Jack Dance’s photo tribute to Cameron here:
Lee Dance, Cameron’s daughter, had this to say about Cameron,
“We are forever thankful that we had a Dad who took us to church, encouraged our Faith, talked openly about his love for Jesus and exemplified how to love others well.”
Friedrich Nietzsche was right to say,
“What the father has hidden comes out in the children, and often I have found the children to be a father’s revealed secret.”
Dana White said, “My legacy to me is when I drop dead, and my kids are at my funeral. I want my three kids to get up and say he was an awesome dad.” Thankfully, my brother Cameron passed the Dana White Ultimate Test for Success. His children and grandchildren were honest about his many quirks, but all experienced his legacy of love that all good fathers share with their children.
Lovework
Can you pass Dana White’s Legacy of Love Success Test? Here it is again in Dana’s own words, in case you have forgotten. “My legacy to me is when I drop dead, and my kids are at my funeral. I want my three kids to get up and say he was an awesome dad.” I don’t know about you, but I am still working on it.
Yours for a Legacy of Love,
Warwick Marsh
PS: Just a very practical suggestion. Do your Will sooner rather than later. Australia Post has a simple do it yourself Will Kit which my wife and I used over 16 years ago. You will save your loved ones a lot of needless expense and a lot of heartache if you do.
___
Republished with thanks to Dads4Kids. Image courtesy of Adobe.
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Thank you for this Warwick, God bless you.
Thank you for your kind words!!!!
A very heartfelt article Warwick. I only wish I could have met Cameron before he received his promotion!
Thank you so much for your kind words and condolences.
Thankyou Warwick for sharing this very candid and personal reflection on your brother Cameron’s life and legacy. Thanks for inviting us to see his thanksgiving service and be impacted by the beauty and uniqueness of his life and quirks, struggles and passions, all underpinned by the solid, gold seamed bedrock of his joy and trust in Jesus. Services like this are like a shot of adrenaline, awakening us to freshly embrace the gifts of life and love and relationships while we have them; and doing fueled by an eternal, gospel informed, grace freeing perspective.
Love and blessings to you and your family as you grieve, love and remember special times with Cameron.
Thank You Andrea! It is hard to be honest about the people you love. You can exaggerate the good or exaggerate and focus on the bad. William Shakespeare well said, “The evil that men do lives after them; The good is oft interred with their bones.” In Cameron’s case he made mistakes like we (Me included) like we all do but he did not have a bad bone in his body. He was generous to a fault. as was his deceased wife Jacky Marsh. I think the Thanksgiving funeral service was extremely honest in the best possible way. What you said Andrea about the service is incredibly beautiful and prescient. “Services like this are like a shot of adrenaline, awakening us to freshly embrace the gifts of life and love and relationships while we have them; fuelled by an eternal, gospel informed, grace freeing perspective.” Very true!!!!
Again a massive vote of thanks to all my friends who shared their love and condolences on Facebook and email plus text!
May that be the legacy that we all leave, of a praying parent and grandparent. The blessing and assurance of living for Jesus, comes to fruition when we see Jesus when we leave this earth, and knowing that our love and prayers for our family haven’t been wasted. Thanks for sharing these encouraging and beautiful words Warwick as you grieve the loss of your brother, but also have assurance that he is living his best life in heaven xxx
Thank you Carol for your words of wisdom and kindness!!!
A beautiful tribute to your brother Cameron, the service was a great celebration of his life, which radiated much love shared by all who spoke.
Thank you Jenny for your words of encouragment!!
Thank you Warwick for sharing with your Daily Declaration family this testimony of love. I have been to two friends funerals already this year, one of young man in his thirties and one for a 90 year old grandma. I agree they are most precious gatherings when time seems to stand still for us to reflect on our humanity. We are all most fearfully and wonderfully made and its so good to celebrate this. Best wishes to you and all your wider family Warwick.
Thank You jim for your very kind words. Yes the truth comes out at Funerals. Those who love jesus and loved people bring forth a good report!!!!!
Hi Warwick…I still cant believe it…Ive known Cameron for over 20 years and He was so full of life and love for the Lord and those around him.He was a worshipper, a praying man, a inventive builder of house and many projects, a farmer and a fisherman.I spent quite a few times fishing and prawning. and fireside worship in and around some of Tasmania’s beautiful wild places…He often rang to tell and ask about some project he was doing on his block or building little jon boats from ply…He would call in and have a feed and or a shower and off again on another venture..I know that the Lord would have met him with a guitar on that day…much loved, much missed…Cameron Marsh.🙏
My Condolences to you, Warwick. You were so lucky to have had a brother.! An Only Child. I really miss not having one with only loving relatives in USA+ Europe..Thank God for giving him to you.Remember the good times as children + adults you shared. He is now with his Heavenly Father, looking down on you.Tasmania ‘s record of car accident deaths + injured is so much higher this year, it has the Authorities worried.
My prayers + those of my relatives Overseas have been answered by the reconcilation of one of my daughters with me after24 years who allowed her small boy to speak to me. He has won a medal for sport as best for his age in Australia. My other daughter still wants nothing to do with me because I did not support her when she stole from her employer .
In 2024 the whole of the right side of my face was a mass of cancers which have all disappeared recently without treatment in answer to my prayers. I was just a skeleton + so ill , I thought I’d be dead before Christmas ! I was approved for Respite in a Nursing Home as a vehicle to enter a Nursing Home, but, I have put on 10 kilos + had a miraculous recovery ! Am back to driving, went toThe Wooden Boat Festival, look forward to paddling in the sea near home , +, finally had the joy of being able to walk around my acres to pick blackberries, watch the butterflies + Welcome Swallows( which nest under my verandah) eating the mosquitoes, fattening up for their annual return journey 1, 000s of km to to China + Siberian Russia. I watch the resident echidna, the lizard which lives near my door –+ keep a cautious lookout for a resident Tiger Snake. The roses need freeing from the weeds. Such joy ! I am no longer after 3 years a prisoner inside my home ! Thank you , God for this Miracle ! The Doctors are shocked !Recovered without any medication !All caused 3 years ago within one week of having Covid Vaccine which made me an invalid for all these years ! I am now nearly 81+ widowed for years from a wonderful Scottish Highlander. Obviously , God has plans for me.Perhaps I’ll go to jail+ lose my home for “Hate Speech “for my criticism of the religion of Islam ? Too bad if I do . It needs calling out, or, we lose our country like the UK !
Greatly appreciate your condolences. I am very thankful for my brother. He would have been able to catch that Tiger snake that is lurking around your home.
My troubles are not over .Last year when I was seriously ill, I received shocking news .2 Notices from Council threatening fines, prosecution+ demolition of my unfinished home of 23 years on the grounds it had never been built with Council Approval .(Council Records had been destroyed by the flood of 2004 , plus, in 2003 , there was no requirement for a Occupancy Permit). I faced Homelessness , +, stilll do !In 2002 I changed State to try to save my life from a mystery illness (it turned out to be a metal clip left inside me which was cutting my intestine + threatening my Appendix to burst ). I had money to pay cash for a mansion, but, through 3 years of misfortune not of our making, it was all gone , +, all we hadleft was an unlined Colour -bond shed . In 2003 Council gave us permission to live inside it + convert it at our leisure into a home as we saved money, but, Ian then developed cancer , + , 3 years ‘late, r died. I was so broke I had to sell our firearms to pay for the funeral. The Catholic priest felt so sorry for us, he waived his fee. I hired a Scottish Piper as Ian was Scottish+ nearly all The St Andrew Socy attended.I hired only licensed tradesmen whenever I saved a bit of money+ looked forward in 2024 to 2 finished bathrooms when the Notices to stop all work , etc arrived. Land Titles Dept registered my homelong ago as a “Dwelling “+ Dept of Finance in 2004 refunded Land Tax paid by us when the Mayor + General Manager of the Council testified they had granted us permission to live in it in 2003 ! Just over a year ago , the new Mayor + General Manager are Victorians.Problem compounded by my Victorian Developer next-door neighbour who owns a block that can’t be built on + wants my land for the sea view for next to nothing . Calls himself a Pakistani Muslim “prince “but is no such thing! The Council mentions his name with extreme reverence. I suspect the “prince “thing is a cover to explain money-laundering ? He had a team remove all the new fence , trespass inside my land + attempt to cut inside alllaround every tree, bush for a width of 10 metres. Luckily , I was home +the team was stopped by local policeman. My rates are all paid.I can’t afford to pay from my pension for a Building Surveyor or to pay for lots of Planning Permits which could cost me $50, 000-00 which willl cost my other neighbour who wants to relocate to build on his seaside small block.Too much expensive Red Tape , no wonder no one can afford a home ! So, I am doomed to live with just 2 toilets + no shower or bath, + much else that needs doing !I’m NOT going ! Council can evict me a 80 year -old frail widow, an Associate of the RSL + widow of an Australian Ex-Serviceman. How will they like the bad publicity –making me Homeless ? David , my neighbour, has contacts+ has offered to to assist me as he says I am the “best neighbour “he’s ever had as I mind my own business . Without him + the Italian/Australian Charity I would have starved last year because I was too frail to drive all 2024 + there are no Services where I live. I don’t know what will happen to mein future ? I’m NOT moving, The bailiff will have to drag me out ! I want Media publicity. I will not leave my home of 23 years without a fight .Council can go to Hell , them + their Muslim phoney “prince “who wants my land at rock bottom price !
Dear Countess. Give me a call on 0418 225 212. I might know someone who might be able to assist you. Wonderful to hear about your healing!!! The Covid vaccine was anything but Safe & Effective more Dreadful and Deadly
Thanks for sharing your brother’s funeral with your wider Christian family,it was such a personal,powerful,deeply real funeral about such an amazing Godly man who wasn’t afraid to be himself or to share his love of God to everyone.
What his grandson said showed what is truly important in life and challenged me in being more out there about my faith and love as I interact with my grandchildren and others.
Blessings to all his precious family as they miss Cameron do much,but have the blessed hope of eternity together .
An unsung hero of the faith for sure,a privilege to share this celebration of his life with you all.
Dear Anthea: Thanks so much for watching the funeral. Greatly appreciate your kind words and comments. Like you the funeral made me realise just how deeply loved my brother was by so many! Soli Deo Gloria!
Dearest Warwick and family .. Phil and I have only just come across your sad news that your precious brother was promoted to heaven .. what a true joy his life was and yes what a legacy of love he has left . .. we feel we got the honor and privilege of getting to know you and your beautiful family a little through the wonderful celebration of Cameron’s life .. thank you for allowing us that time and we are very blessed and encouraged by all the stories songs and prayers that were shared through the day.
Our condolences for your loss and a prayer for comfort and peace for you and the whole family as you transition into your next season without Cameron’s presence.. we will all meet together soon in glory .. time is short and there are so many yet to hear the good news that Cameron shared so well . You are such a blessing Warwick .
Love n hugs from Phil and Jo Adams C3 church Jervis Bay xxx♥️♥️♥️🕊
Dear Jocelyn, Thanks so much for watching the funeral. Your comment is very true!!! “What a true joy his life was and yes what a legacy of love he has left ” Greatly appreciate your kind words and comments.