Australia’s Largest Christian News Site

In the great progressive utopia known as modern Victoria, there now exists a sacred ritual more inviolable than the national anthem and far more frequent: the Acknowledgement of Country.

A noble sentiment in essence, it has now metastasised into the bureaucratic equivalent of a Gregorian chant, solemnly intoned before every public meeting, morning briefing, and, if the activists get their way, possibly before flushing public toilets.

Enter Shaun Turner, a Darebin council-employed street sweeper.

Turner committed what is now considered a secular sin in the progressive gospel: he asked a question.

Specifically, he queried whether it was necessary to perform an Acknowledgement of Country before the weekly street sweeping session.

Street Sweeper Sacked

That’s right, a man who sweeps streets for a living questioned the liturgical value of repeatedly acknowledging traditional owners before discussing broom allocation and high-vis compliance.

For this blasphemy, he was promptly swept aside. (See what I did there?)

Now, before the cancel-happy clerics in the Church of Wokeness grab their pitchforks, it’s worth noting Mr Turner never objected to Acknowledgement of Country itself.

He merely suggested, in his treasonous simplicity, that perhaps such acknowledgements should be reserved for more meaningful occasions.

Like, say, council meetings where policy is set – not toolbox talks where the most pressing item is a discussion about whether it would be better to clean the north-bound or south-bound lane first.

Naturally, the council reacted the way all bureaucracies trained in postmodern groupthink do: they held a meeting…

A formal one.

With HR.

In keeping with the spirit of reconciliation – which apparently does not include reconciling with people who hold mildly different opinions – the street sweeper was asked to explain himself.

Turner did what any clear-thinking, irony-aware Australian would do in 2025: he brought an Indigenous support person to the meeting with him.

This is the part where the logic hole becomes a sinkhole.

A man accused of cultural insensitivity arrived at his disciplinary meeting with an Indigenous ally.

You might assume that would settle the matter.

You might assume it would lead to an adult conversation about balancing respect with relevance.

The street sweeper politely told council bosses…

“I don’t need to be welcomed into my own country.

“It’s getting out of hand and people are losing it, it is now being done at the opening of a postage stamp.”

‘Serious Misconduct’: Darebin council

Council called this “serious misconduct” and, in classic Orwellian fashion, terminated his employment for “failing to comply with council values.”

“Council values” is the modern euphemism for “shut up and agree.”

It’s a secular dogma designed to enforce ideological obedience under the gentle euphemism of “inclusion.”

It’s also posted in PowerPoint format on the HR portal between modules on how not to sexually harass the office printer and why wheelie bins must identify as culturally safe spaces.

So this is where we are now. In a society so allergic to common sense that a street sweeper is fired not for misconduct, not for insubordination, not for failing to sweep the sacred footpath, but for politely suggesting that virtue-signalling might be more effective when done sparingly.

Turner wasn’t fired for hate speech. He wasn’t fired for discrimination. He was fired for wrongthink – and worse, for saying it out loud.

If that doesn’t warrant an Acknowledgement of Stupidity, I don’t know what does.

But, as with all council stories, just when you think it cannot get any stupider, it does.

Fair Work Commission Overturns Turner Decision

The Fair Work Commission found the council was wrong to have sacked Turner for disrespecting council values because he had never completed the mandatory module outlining council values.

In other words, the street sweeper couldn’t be sacked for sacrilege if he had never actually read the sacred texts.

It turns out Mr Turner had been playing golf on the day staff members completed the council’s online values training.

Never fear! One of Turner’s bosses – clearly more efficient than righteous – logged in as Tuner and completed the module for him.

Why?

Because, like any self-respecting public servant, he was sick of the endless email alerts.

Ding! “Mr Tuner needs to complete his anti-racism module.”

Ding! “Don’t forget Mr Turner hasn’t yet done his unconscious bias test.”

Ding!

Ding!

Ding!

So, Turner never saw the module. Never clicked through the slides. Never ticked the box that said “I understand that my opinion is invalid unless pre-approved by the Council of Cultural Purity.”

And then – plot twist! – he was fired for not complying with council values.

Let that sink in. The council terminated him for failing to uphold values he’d never even been told about because someone else had pretended he had been told.

The Fair Work Commission pointed out what should have been obvious to any literate wombat: you can’t fire a man for failing to apply values he was never given the chance to absorb.

Especially when the method of absorption involved his boss impersonating him on the system like a dodgy IT guy trying to steal Bitcoin.

So Turner’s sacking was overturned.

But the damage has already been done.

Thought Criminals in a Free Land

We now live in a land where you can be branded a thought criminal not because of what you think, but because of what you didn’t even get the chance to think, all thanks to someone else who just wanted the notifications to stop.

Shaun Turner’s street sweeper story is a reminder that the road to woke hell isn’t just paved with good intentions.

It’s also got a pothole full of auto-completed modules and fake digital signatures.

___

Originally published at The James Macpherson Report.

Subscribe to his Substack here for daily witty commentary.

Images via Adobe.