Mother’s Day Story of Pain, Grief & Forgiveness from an Indigenous Woman

17 August 2019

7.2 MINS

By Sharmaine Meek.

Just before Mother’s Day 2019, I prepared a video clip on the oft-overlooked consequences of abortion. The background was that the Federal Elections were only a matter of weeks away, and the Labor Party wanted to force the states to decriminalise Abortion.

As an indigenous woman, I know we abort an innocent, helpless form of life, sacrificed on the altars of convenience, shame and selfishness.

Whether we like it or not, we are wiping out whole bloodlines and generations of Australians. Long-range, think about it: if there are no future generations of Australians, what will we have?

We need to take a good, long hard look down the corridor of time. And I am not just talking about Indigenous Australians!

We enjoy the pleasure of sex, but we cannot handle the responsibility that comes with it. So, we take the convenient way out, abort the unwanted ‘thing’, and get on with our lives.

Contrary to some belief systems, Life starts at conception.

Mother’s Day Mourning

I would like to share with you what happened to me on the morning of Mothers Day, May 12th 2019, this year, after the video clip.

My sons always call me on Mother’s Day; this year I even received Roses from my eldest son. Glory to God.

This year, after three or so years, I received a text message from my daughter. Glory to God. There is more to this story.

With these videos, I felt a joy inside of me, probably not understanding that behind the scenes, God was up to something. I felt at peace, thinking maybe once again, that His life He has given to me may be able to help someone out there, even one; maybe it would save one baby’s life. That was my thinking from Friday and Saturday. We at the Congregation over the last few weeks have been dealing with Bloodline Iniquities, with repentance etc.

So come Sunday morning, I was standing in the shower, talking to Him about the video and who may see it etc. Then I heard Him clearly say, “You are the mother of six children, not three.

I started to weep, it was like a shockwave went over me, a left-field revelation, yet in His Voice was gentleness and love. I felt like I was melting under this confronting wave of reality that had just touched me.

In 1994, my husband and I tried to have a child of our own. He has 2 daughters from his first marriage; his wife divorced him for another man. I thought as I had two sons and a daughter, it would be nice to have a son for him.

We tried surgery to reverse the tubal ligation I had when I was 22 years old; it failed. So we opted for IVF. Lots of money and much stress, I tell you, but the long and short of that saga, was that two eggs were fertilised, placed inside my womb, but failed also. Hence, we have two children in Heaven with God.

We just got on with our lives and started to travel more for the ministry, accepting that He had them and life goes on.

Not long after this happened, in 2002, we were in Greece ministering, and sensed a calling to pray for married couples that could not have children. The result of that call was that 8 couples came forward for prayer that day in October: 6 Filipinos, 1 Albanian, and 1 Sri Lankan. By November 2003, eight children were born; we have a picture of six of them sitting in a row (the day we took the photo, two of the girls were not there).

We then noticed that every time we called for prayer for couples to have children, they were falling pregnant very quickly: Germans, Vietnamese, Congolese, Nigerian, Dutch, Filipino and others.

We were so happy. He had given us a gift, a gift that gave so much joy to people and us. I would go back to Churches, and they would shout out, holding the baby in the air, “Here is your prophetic baby!” Oh, what joy and happiness we all shared.

I believe God’s loving heart gave us this gift to pray for barren women to help us with a void we had. I minister to women who have had abortions, still-births, and various other problems that arise in women with pregnancies.

One young woman, just married, was devastated at the loss of her first baby, and deep in depression. I was able to talk to her, and the result was: after her forgiveness of herself, she has two beautiful children. This was in Italy.

Another woman, a Pastor’s wife: her first baby died, and she would not accept that it was dead. I spoke with her in Belgium. The result of that was similar to the above; she had a beautiful son, Solomon, chocolate brown, black curly hair — they are Congolese. I believe she also had a daughter.

We were at the dedication in Frankfurt of a Nigerian baby boy — doctors said there was no way they would ever have a baby; the same with a German man married to a Filipino, they had a daughter, but the doctors said no way — well, Dr. Jesus was passing by and they have another daughter. Hallelujah. So He has been very, very gracious to us about babies.

Mother’s Day Encounter

I am 71 years old. God took me back to 55 years ago, when I was 15 years old. I was living at Rozelle in Sydney with my parents. I had so many dreams when I was young. I wanted to get married, have some children and live happily ever after. For you who have read my book ,you will know the heartbreak I endured. I have lived through many shattered dreams, smashed to smithereens, mainly by my own silly choices and other circumstances.

I had a dream as a 13 year old, that I would remain a virgin until I married. I met my first boyfriend when I was 14. My parents moved to Sydney and took me with them, I think to get me away from him. But he came to Sydney too.

I was coerced into sex, one morning while my parents were at the market. My dream was shattered.

Not long after that, he returned to Melbourne. I was pregnant; my Mother was panicking. I saw her abort a baby in front of me when I was 10-11 years old.

I took something she gave me, and that was it. I was bleeding; I found something floating in the toilet. Mother comes in, she is happy, I am not. No doctor, no nothing, as if it never happened. Lots of blood. I took what was in the toilet, and I buried it under the house, having a girl’s funeral service. Kind of.

I fell into a deep depression and could not pull out of it. It got so bad, especially the day a letter came from my boyfriend’s Mother in Melbourne, informing me that he had found a new girlfriend and he was not coming back to me.

Well, I decided to put my head in the gas oven. I only turned it off because I could not stand the smell. Or was Someone watching over me?

I have never ever told this to anybody: only on Sunday did I share this with my husband. All these years I had buried this so very deep, in a Grave of Denial, Guilt and Shame. I could not face it, I did not want to face it.

But on Mother’s Day 2019, through His enabling power, God visited me as I was showering, and helped me to face reality. He said I was the Mother of 6 children, and He does not lie. I had a major meltdown, I wept and wept, I repented, seriously repented; I forgave my Mother for lack of support, emotional support and understanding; I forgave the father of the child for deserting me and being of no emotional support; and most of all, I forgave myself. This all occurred on Mother’s Day.

I remembered when I had the funeral service under the house, I said, I am sorry and I love you. I started to remember lots of things, so deeply buried, all I could say to God, was Thank You, Thank You, Thank You, over and over again.

Waves swept over me. I knew God understood, I knew He loved me, I knew He was there. I had tried so hard to forget this ever happened.

I said to God: I failed, I failed, all I ever wanted was to be a good Mother. I think this episode had and has played a very important part in shaping my character, and how I relate to others, etc.

I think this revelation also had something to do with the caring, nurturing side of God’s loving heart.

The pain I experienced, coming to see and understand that I failed to express His loving, nurturing heart by doing what I consented to do with my Mother, is indescribable. I humbly thank Him for it, because I know somewhere, sometime, it may help someone else.

Yes, I am the Mother of six children; three are in Heaven and three are on the way, they might not know that. Ha! Ha!

At some point in time, if I can, I will be sharing this with my other three children, and I will have a chat with my ex-husband and share with him also.

Back to bloodlines: my Mother I recall, aborted three babies, to my knowledge THREE OR MORE BLOODLINES — untold generations of Australians.

Then follows me, with another generation of bloodlines aborted, then another generation aborts — Three Bloodlines?

Do you believe in coincidences? If God was a criminal we would lock Him up, His Fingerprints are all over this.

Maybe we can raid a few emotional cemeteries into the future, bringing resurrection life to women who have suffered the pain and grief that abortion brings to mother and baby.

Message to Our Parliamentarians

To those who want this criminal act of killing innocent children to be made legal in our beautiful country: This country has been blessed by God. You might have a different belief, but this country was founded on Judeo-Christian foundations.

We are not to murder. We have enough trouble in this country with innocent children being sexually abused, and I was one of them. The Hand of His blessings upon us will lift if we continue down this pathway of shedding innocent blood.

Please, I appeal to the Parliamentarians of the NSW Parliament, have mercy and do not pass this bill. You only have to study world history and civilisations that no longer exist because of human sacrifices.

And it doesn’t matter what our opinions and belief systems may be; to abort a baby is to sacrifice innocent blood. Life is sacred, it is a gift from Him. Will we ignorantly or perhaps arrogantly shake our fist at Him in defiance of His laws, His commandment, “You shall not Murder”? To make our own laws that are contrary to His?

Please, choose wisely. Because with great power comes great responsibility. There will come a day of reckoning for all of us. You have been blessed by Him, who placed you in Government. Be a good leader.


[Photo by Luis Galvez on Unsplash]

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