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Ed Cole left a lasting legacy teaching men how to maximise their manhood and put their families first, accepting that fatherhood was their primary responsibility.

Isn’t it an awesome privilege to be a father? When you witness the birth of your first child, it truly is a humbling experience. Unfortunately, no one hands you a manual to help you.

That is why it is so important for us as fathers to find role models whom we can look to guide us through the uncharted waters of fatherhood. As manhood is the foundation for fatherhood, we need mentors for manhood as well.

For me, Edwin Louis Cole was such a man. When I first heard Ed Cole speak at a weekend businessmen’s retreat at Meroo, New South Wales in the early eighties, he just blew me out of the water. Here was a man’s man who pulled no punches. You could tell he lived his own words!

Ed always told it like it was. He told the truth in love. Ed Cole majored in speaking to men; perhaps challenging men would be a better description. If you wanted to stay in your comfort zone, hearing Dr Cole speak was not a good idea. Here are some examples:

“Maturity comes not with age but with the acceptance of responsibility.
You are only young once, but immaturity can last a lifetime!”
~ Edwin Louis Cole

“Greatness comes through serving.
The more you serve, the greater you become.”
~ Edwin Louis Cole

“Being a male is a matter of birth.
Being a man is a matter of choice.”
~ Edwin Louis Cole

“You don’t drown by falling in the water;
you drown by staying there.”
~ Edwin Louis Cole

“Winners are not those who never fail,
but those who never quit.”
~ Edwin Louis Cole

“The absentee father is the curse of our day.”
~Edwin Louis Cole

“It may well be that the father is home every day but does not spend time with his children. Corporate life with its pressures to produce loyalty to the logo, and affection for ambition creates havoc in the home. Many wives know that their husband’s adulterous relationship is not with another woman but with their jobs.”
~ Edwin Louis Cole

As a young executive building a corporate empire, this last statement hit me between the eyes. Our company at the time was turning over five million dollars per year in today’s monetary equivalent. My business was growing rapidly, but my relationships were withering.

Listening to Dr Cole, I realised I had to make changes to the way I was living for the sake of my children and family. I can honestly say that Ed Cole’s books and messages have had a profound impact on my life.

Ed Cole was a pioneer in the men’s movement worldwide and later on, some of his associates formed the Promise Keepers, which affected tens of millions of men around the world, including in Australia.

The chairman of Dads4Kids, Trevor Suitor, helped kick off Promise Keepers in the mid-nineties here in New South Wales. This later morphed into more of an Australian model called “Men of Integrity”.

Ed Cole led by example. He was a father to three children, grandfather, author, businessman, public speaker and a spiritual father to men. The Ed Cole Organisation, CMN, had seventy international offices at its peak, serving 210 countries.

The CMN website tells the full story. The 14 books Ed Cole has authored, including Maximized Manhood, have over 4 million copies in circulation in more than 40 different languages. Dr Cole’s goal to build men and raise sons has been realised worldwide in a profound way.

On 27 August 2002, Ed Cole passed away, aged 80 years. Interestingly, this was the year that Dads4Kids started. One could argue his influence lives on in the weekly newsletter, the fatherhood courses, and the Men’s Leadership Summit. (Sorry, bookings have closed.)

We all stand on the shoulders of great men. Without Ed Cole’s wisdom, I would not have been able to become the father I needed to become. In a similar way, the catalyst and inspiration behind Dads4Kids was Indigenous elder Pastor Ronnie Williams.

Without Ed Cole’s teaching, I would not have understood the power and wisdom of Ronnie Williams’ words when he said at Parliament House in 1998, “Australia’s greatest need is for fathers.”

So today, 20 years after his passing, and for our 20-year celebration of existence as Dads4Kids, we honour Ed Cole for his guts to tell us what we didn’t want to hear. His books and words live on in people’s hearts and minds.

We honour you, Ed, for your sacrifice to go against the flow. We honour you, Ed, for your courage to speak out, knowing that because you did, there are now tens of thousands, if not millions, of men who are determined to make a difference in the world as Maximised Men. Many of whom read this newsletter each week.

Lovework

Think about someone who has inspired you to be a better dad or a better person. Write them a letter or give them a call and honour them by saying thank you! Why not start with your own family? Your thank you might really encourage someone. As you honour those who have gone before you, so your children will also honour you.

Yours for more Maximised Men,
Warwick Marsh

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First published at Dads4Kids. Photo by Alena Darmel.